Dilemma

Piang...! My blog died and resurrected suddenly today!

Been so caught up with work overwhelming.
It never seem to end really.
One after another.
One task after another.
One more responsibility after another.
One more problem after another.
New staff come and go.
Everyday went through like a blink of an eye.

Is this the life I have always wanted?
I really wonder.
I thought life is sometimes meant to be like a fairytale.
Roses are always red.
There is always something to smile about, to be happy about.
The harsh reality is...
Frustrations, deadlines, shocks.
Well, but thank God that I have a good boss.
Enjoyed working with her thoroughly.
Thank God my colleagues are still considered not bad.
They are a great bunch of people.
No glitz and glamor in my job.
Just hard work and more hard work.
Headache and more headache.

Do I want to switch job?
Yes and No.
Yes because I want an industry with more glitz and glamor.
Yes because I want to be inspired everyday with cool stuff at work.
But.
No because I cant bear to leave.
I can be myself here.
I always have my colleagues to make me laugh when the going gets tough.
Hmmm.
To leave or not to leave?

The questions of a dilemma.

Proverbs 16:9

Having a very busy 4-5 months lately.
Been caught up with working non-stop day in day out.
Such that I lost touch with a lot of people in my life.
*feeling kinda country cave suddenly*
Am thankful for those constant faithful friends in my life though.
Chance upon a journal entry I wrote more than 200 days ago in the beginning of the year which states God's promises and calling for me.
Am thankful once again for He answered my prayers regarding the area of my vocation calling.
Have seen how He blessed the work I do, and brings much glory because I am doing what He made me to do!
I really wonder why is it that God chooses to bring such a loooong delay to His promises sometimes.
Is it that He is trying to teach me something?
Perhaps it is to trust more in Him,
Desperately wanting His promises more,
Or simply learning to wait on Him.
Either of these all, He definitely made me trust more in His timing.
His timing is weird to me.
Very weird because I felt His timing is always super late.
But what can I say, He is God, I am not.
So, let it be then.

In his heart, a man plans his course,
But the Lord determines the step.
- Proverbs 16:9

I wish that He will reveal more of the future to me.
Yet, will it really be for my benefit?
Perhaps not.
Living each day by itself is full of uncertainty, but it also brings a kind of expectation as in, 'what is God going to do today?' kind of thing.

For example, how would I know that He would allow me to fall sick 2 days before one of my most impt exam, and allow me to end up in A&E for 4 hours? I can say I have really tried my best to take care of my health, but I still fall sick.
In the end, I am graduating next year.
Sounds kinda sad but...
I now have the option of going to UK for graduation.
And it means I can finally fulfill my dreams of going overseas by myself for studies purposes.
If not for this incident, I probably will never go overseas for study purposes.
And thank God there is one familiar face going with me - Charlie Koh.
And potentially 2 more wonderful gal friend - Joelle & Sarah.


Right now, my focus is really on bringing glory to God through the work I do.
May the rest of the things fade away!

Seriously...............................

Seriously seriously seriously, it sucks to go through July 2011.

School-
2 final exams. 1 sub-paper exam. 1 fyp presentation. 1 fyp report.
Work-
Prep for August mega exhibition of the year. Website total revamp.

B***** h***!!!!!
How am I going to cope?!
I really think I am going into a temperamental foul mood swing this month.
If it is just going to be me, I will be complaining, negative, and everything rubbish....
It's God's grace if I am going through it peaceful, calm & positive.
God, help me...


Life's quote:
At the times when you least expected it, someone walks into your life and lift you up.
It always always always happens.

If I could live again...

If I could live again from aged 15,
I would take more risks.
I would jump straight to do marketing at a younger age.

I would love those I love more.
I would spend more time with those I love and fear less.

I would live even more fuller in life.
I would decide to be happier and dwell on discouragement lesser.

I would spend more time cultivating my interests.
I would master my piano and guitar skills.

But I am not that old, so I will live life again.



Letting God choose is perhaps the best thing I can do for myself.
Letting God direct my career paths, my friendships, my relationships.
Letting God take control of my time and my finance.
Trusting God to make the best of everything.
Knowing my feelings and my emotions are not a good indicator of circumstances.
Letting the peace of God to fill my heart is better.

I live my life again today.
Knowing my God is the Alpha and the Omega.
He knows my life from beginning to the end.

Whatever lar.

Typing away in the office.

Feeling near and far.
Out of touch with reality sometimes.
Out of sync with my peers.
While the world moves on.
And I am stuck working & studying.
What to do?
I am living in the present, but out of sync with my peers.
How great can it be...?

Time Flies like mad

Time really flies like mad.

Good or bad?

Good when I am in office, the pace of work is so damn fast, time flies like nobody's business. I am busy doing what I love and enjoy. Good because I have no time to waste. Good because I have no time to over-think too much about stuff (as I get pretty depressed if I have too much thinking time).

Bad because age is catching up.
Very fast.
Seriously, does it matter?
Well, if I keep a youthful heart, and a youthful mindset, I guess it doesn't really matter.

Time flies.

Like mad.

Busy busy months

How time flies when one is busy!
In just a while, it is already May of year 2011!
Realized that my own blog (and facebook) as well is being abandoned for focusing on my work.
At least I don't think I abandoned my relationship with God, but I guess I took God for granted a lot of times.
Like just talking to God only once in a while, and neglecting to spend extended time with Him.
God, I am so busy, and sometimes tired.
It is erm, quite hard, really.
Anyways...no excuses, Amy!

The good thing about my work is, I have God-loving and God-fearing christian colleagues all around me.
Sure, they aren't perfect, and so am I.
But having them around sure spurs me and encourage me in my relationship with God.

Knowing no matter what situation and what I go through, God is with me through it all gives me much much assurance.

A few days ago in LG, I was feeling quite down and I don't wish to talk.
During P&W, I disappeared to toilet for a while, and I wasn't even able to P&W properly.
Talking to God, I felt really really unloved even in the midst of LG people.
I said, if I just sit there without doing anything, will you really show that you truly care for me?
I was quite amazed, 2 of the sisters noticed I was exceptionally quiet and asked how am I...
Though I said, I am ok, I am not.
It was then during sharing, C* said she used to say 'I am ok' when she is not.
And I realized she knows I am not.
Sometimes, people care but they just did not express it the way you expect.
I thank God for all these people who always show their care and concern for me.
I thank God most importantly for my mom.
Because she gets up early every single morning to prepare breakfast for me.
That is love at its best, isn't it?

Above all the things I treasure in my life, like my work, my mom, my sis, my stuff,
I want to treasure my God much more!